John Rubino is a former Wall Street financial analyst and author or co-author of five books, including The Money Bubble: What to Do Before It Pops and Clean Money: Picking Winners in the Green-Tech Boom. He founded the popular financial website DollarCollapse.com in 2004, sold it in 2022, and now publishes John Rubino’s Substack newsletter.
(Babylon Bee) – In keeping with the Olympics’ commitment to sexual violence and Satan worship, the International Olympic Committee announced today that the 2028 games would be held in the towns of Sodom and Gomorrah.
“They’re a natural fit for us,” explained Olympic Committee director Max Durgen. “Violent sexual debauchery forced upon unsuspecting visitors? Check. Openly mocking the Lord God? Check. They’ll be hard pressed to top Paris, but I think they’re up to the task.”
According to sources, the Olympic Committee has sought to ensure that fun games between nations meant to promote peace and friendship also destroy the innocence of any children who might be watching. “If you’re not sexualizing a little kid who’s just trying to watch his country’s swim team, what are you even doing?” asked marketing chair Steph Reginald. “Everyone needs to see Jesus mocked when they’re wanting to watch gymnastics, and that mockery must include visible testicles. It’s what the Olympics are all about, and that’s why Sodom and Gomorrah will be the perfect host cities.”
Meanwhile, the US presidential campaign has gotten darker, stranger, and, somehow, even funnier:
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